Toddler Activities

Kids always have energy, way more than us parents can ever hope to have.  Keep them busy with these fun toddler activities.

#10 - Piggy Back Rides:  Kids get heavy after awhile and lugging a stroller around all day can be a pain.  Put them up on your shoulders for easy carrying.  It may also cool you off on a hot day.

#9 - Duck, Duck, Goose:  A classic kids' game that will never grow old...unless you're the goose.

#8 - Exploring Nature:  Your children are never too young to enjoy a trip to the zoo.  It's a great place to learn about how animals function.

#7 - Cooking:  My kids love to help me cook.  It can be as simple as hitting the buttons on the microwave or mixing ingredients together in a bowl.  I don't necessarily recommend eating anything they cook though.

#6 - Reading:  The earlier you start reading to your kids, the better off they are.  At this point, they'll just be looking at the pictures, but later they'll swear they just read it for the articles.

#5 - Scavenger Hunts:  Kids love playing Hide 'n' Seek.  A scavenger hunt is Hide 'n' Seek for kids with no friends.  Make up a list of things for your kids to find and send them outdoors.

#4 - Guessing Games:  Kids love to play guessing games like "Guess What's Behind My Back" or "Guess What's Smeared All Over Me".  Enjoy.

#3 - Playing With The Family Pet:  We can send our son outside to play with the dog and he will be busy for a solid hour.  I don't know what they do out there, but I'm sure they're both having a good time.

#2 - Embarassing Mom and Dad:  Kids absolutely love this activity.  Whether it's farting during the silent prayer or cursing in front of Grandma, your toddler will never fail to surprise you.

#1 - Fingerpainting:  Kids love making messes.  Fingerpainting is messy, but you can usually contain it to a sheet or two of paper.  Usually.

You may also want to choose a different medium, like actual finger-paint.  If nothing else, it'll tire your kid out.  Whatever activities you decide to do with your toddler, be sure to take a picture.  You might actually laugh about it later.



Special Thanks: to my good friend Ruzi for sending me an e-mail with these hilarious pictures and many more.  If you have have any funny photos you can share them by visiting The Parenting Dad on Facebook.

Sewing the Unsewable

In light of recent events, I figured it was time to teach you Dads how to sew a button.  My wife was upset yesterday when a button fell off one of the baby's outfits.  I say "fell off", but in reality, it was ripped off when our oldest daughter "helped" to get the baby dressed.  "I can't sew this back on" she said.  Lucky for her, she married a handyman.

The first thing you need to do is forcibly jam the button back in it's button-hole.

Once it's through, you'll notice there is a little wiggle room in the back.  This is where the magic happens.

The magic of duct tape.

Rip off a small piece about an inch or two long.

Wrap the tape around the button to keep it from slipping back through the strap.

You just learned how to sew a button that can't be sewn.  You're welcome.

Thanksgiving Crafts (How to keep your kids occupied for twenty minutes)

 

I found some pretty cool Thanksgiving crafts for kids, unfortunately, most of them looked like they were put together by a parent.  The whole idea behind kids crafts is to keep them occupied while I do something fun.  If I wanted to be involved with my kids I would volunteer to coach the T-ball team.  Here's a fun craft that should keep your kids out of your hair for at least twenty to thirty minutes.

You'll need:

Construction Paper (Black, Brown, Yellow, Orange, Red)
Glue/Gluestick
Scissors
Pen/Pencil
Two Juice Glasses (2 sizes)
And of course, Googly Eyes



Sit your kid down, strap them in if need be, and have them trace two different sized circles using the glasses.  Cut these out for the head and body of your turkey.




Before you crack open that beer and watch The Walking Dead You will need to draw 11 tear-drop shapes on the construction paper for your kid to cut out: 4 red, 4 yellow, and 3 orange.  Also, trace two smaller tear-drops on the orange paper for turkey arms, a diamond for the beak, and a red squiggle for that weird red squiggle that turkeys have.




Glue the feathers down first in an arching pattern (see picture at beginning of post for color order), then cover them halfway with the large brown circle for a body.




Glue the head on next, slap on some googly eyes, and add that weird red flappy thing.  To make the beak, you need to fold your diamond in half before you glue it.  When you're done it should look like the pictures below.

Daddy's Turkey

The Boy's Turkey (with help from Momma)

So how did yours turn out Leah?

Well...at least we had fun...

Advice on Marriage

Just a quick piece of advice on marriage and relationships.   When you bring children into your home, everything changes.  This is true whether you have one child or enough children to start your own TLC special.  The time and energy you used to spend on showing your affections is now diverted to other things like burping the baby, helping with homework, or playing dress-up.  Leah is now up to at least three costume changes a day.





With all this time spent on your child/children it's hard to keep the spark of romance alive in your relationship.  After a long day of giving my best material to the kids, I don't have the energy to do nice things for my wife (like farting in the other room).  But in a relationship, it's important that you take time to do the small things.  So put the lid back down,  hang the toilet paper the right way, and poop with the door closed.  But most importantly, everyday before she goes to work, be sure to say something sweet like, "I love you" or "I hope you're not pregnant".  Stay strong, marriage today is tough.

Trunk or Treat

The only way to Trick-or-Treat is to Trunk or Treat.  You make one stop, unload the kids, and load up your bags with sugar, chocolate and bibles.  Bibles?  Yes, bibles.  Most of the trunk or treating events are put on by churches, so you get to enjoy some Proverbs with your Pixy Stix.

Matthew and Mark just can't compete with Mike and Ike.

In our area there are roughly ten to twelve various Trunk or Treats put on by local churches.  So, how do you decide which one to go to?  You don't.  You go to all of them and stock up on candy for the week.  But, for those of you with time constraints or little gas money, you have a hard choice to make.

Lucky for you, I dragged the children along to 3 different events in order to better understand which denomination puts on the best show and gives the best candy.  The Parenting Dad is all about making you an outstanding Dad (or Mom) and let's face it, if you're reading this blog, you need help.  Giving your kids the best possible Halloween experience is one way to show them how awesome of a parent you are.

First Baptist

Our first stop was the local Baptist church.  I wasn't sure what to expect, because most of the crazy religious things I've heard have come from the mouths of Baptists.  But, like any religious group, there are a small percentage of fanatics that make the news and then there are the normal people who practice peacefully.  We were blessed with the latter...and candy.  Plenty of candy.  For our first stop, I was pretty happy with our haul.  67 goodies (including three bibles) were collected in a matter of about five minutes and although I was pleased with our sugary handouts, it would end up being the smallest score of the night.

Baptist Trunks Look Like This:




I liked how easy it was to get through the line. The parking lot was small and the candy came quick. No chit-chatting, no preaching, just get your Tootsie Pops and roll out of there.  Points lost for no food and handing out toothbrushes/paste.

Assembly of God

Next we hit up the Assembly of God church.  These dudes know how to party.  We brought home 71 different goodies in our bag, including another 3 bibles, and the kids got to bounce around in two separate bounce houses and play games.  The candy was on par with what we had received earlier in the night, but the atmosphere was drastically changed.  Loud music, long lines, and kids running around everywhere.  For people dressed as the undead, things sure seemed alive.

United Methodist

If you're looking for quantity, hit up your local Methodist church, that's where we got the most candy (and the least bibles), 76 pieces in all.  You can also find free food (chili and hot dogs), but unfortunately, no games or bounce house.  When we first pulled up we were treated to some loud reggae music and people dancing.  Apparently, we had just missed the start of the flash mob.

Methodists have the best decorated trunks too.I have to say that because one of these trunks is my mom's.  Special bonus prize: Be the first to guess which trunk is hers and you can win a free New Testament/Proverbs/Psalms mini-bible.  3 styles to choose from!





I'd love to be able to tell you more about the Methodist church's Trunk or Treat.  I'd love to tell you how tasty the chili was and to be able to show you more pictures of trunks.  However, halfway through the candy line, Libby decided to give me her own Halloween treat.

It's all fun and games until the baby pees on somebody.

Results:

My life's work.

So which church has the best Trunk or Treat?  That depends.  If you want quantity and free food, go to the Methodists, they gave us the most candy.  For some serious fun, it's Assembly of God all the way.  I hear their morning services are quite interesting as well.  For quality, it's Baptists you want.  The money they saved by not providing food or a bounce house went into purchasing name-brand candy bars like Snickers, Crunch, Butterfinger and more.  Of all the loot we received, they had the least amount of off-brand candy.  These results are in no way meant to be conclusive.  More research is needed and I will gladly dedicate my life to perfecting these results.  These tasty, sugary results.