The Importance of Drinking At Noon

Beer and Lao Tzu - Two great paths to inner peace.

An apple a day might keep the doctor away, but a beer at lunch keeps the kids alive.  By noon, I have already been asked approximately 50 questions.  Actually, it's more like they ask the same 5 questions ten times.

"Can you get me chocolate milk?"

"Can you start a movie for me?"

"Can you make me a sandwich?"

"Can you get me a pop-tart?"

"When is mommy coming home?"

That last question is mine, but you get the point.

All of these questions and demands can take a toll on a guy.  Don't ask what your Daddy can do for you, ask what you can do for your Daddy.  Right around lunchtime my stress level is somewhere between "I want to put my fist through this wall" and "Hammer this is Thumb,  Thumb, Hammer."

Now doesn't that feel better?

But after I've calmed the kids down by stuffing them full of Blueberry Pop-Tarts (Great Value Brand), pouring them chocolate milk, and setting them up with Monster House (again), it's Daddy's turn.  I can sit at the table eating my BLB sandwich (bacon, lettuce, bacon) and savor the sweet, calming flavors of a Dutch Lager.  There's just something about sitting down kid-free and enjoying a beer that makes the world feel right again.

I don't consume anywhere near the level of alcohol I did in my younger days.  I would like to say I'm more responsible about my drinking, but the reality is, I don't have the money to spend on it anymore.  Between paying $20 for a can of baby formula, $15 for a  box of diapers and going through a $4 gallon of milk every two days, my drinking days are far behind me.

Perhaps that's why a beer at lunch is so relaxing.  It reminds me of a time before children and responsibilities, before I had to budget beer money, and a time before my beer gut.

The Official Beer of the London Olympics.